No, I Don't Owe the Internet an Explanation
We’ve all seen them. Most of us have probably even used them. They are what I like to call “Mom Disclaimers.”
Those little things you add when you post a picture to let the world know you’re not a bad mom.
Things like: “I know the line is blue on his diaper; I changed it right after this picture.”
Or, “Yes she’s wearing just a diaper, don’t worry she has clothes.”
Maybe even: “The scratch on his cheek is from when he fell while playing outside.”
The thing is, you don’t owe the world an explanation. You shouldn’t have to defend yourself constantly.
You should feel free to post those pictures with confidence, without worrying about the hate and judgement from others. Aren’t we already dealing with enough?
I’m absolutely not saying you can’t use them, especially if they give you a peace of mind. By all means, mamas, use those mom disclaimers!
I’m just saying we shouldn’t feel like we HAVE to. Like if we don’t, we will immediately get judged and attacked.
Which, of course, has happened. That’s why we use them in the first place. Either we’ve experienced hateful comments firsthand, or we’ve seen someone else experience them and we want to avoid that at all costs.
But the world that is The Internet should not be so quick to judge. They shouldn’t be so quick to assume the worst. What is with that, anyway?
Why can’t everyone assume the best, for once?
I know there is always going to be That Person. The one who is always going to be hateful, judge-y, and assume the worst. I know that.
I also know it is way easier said than done to just “ignore those comments.” With the mom guilt we are already feeling, I know it can be easy to start to second guess ourselves.
Should I have posted that picture? Maybe it does look bad. Maybe I am a bad mom for not having noticed that diaper before trying to take a picture.
But you are not a bad mom. You are doing amazing.
You are documenting memories for your precious babies to look back on. They’re not going to care about trivial things like a blue line on a diaper.
Let those people lash out and live in their resentment.
You know the behind-the-scenes. You know that you care for your babies and love them more than anything in the world.
You don’t owe anyone an explanation, but you can give it if you want. If it helps you have more confidence about posting that picture, then absolutely do it.
So yes, of course I changed that diaper. But I wasn’t going to try to retake the one-in-a-million-shot picture over it.
Yes, she was wearing just a diaper. We were in the middle of changing and she made the funniest facial expression. I’m not going to ask her to have a retake.
Yes, there is a scratch on his cheek. My children are being CHILDREN. They roughhouse, they play, they trip and fall.
They are living their best life and I will not apologize for it.